Saturday, May 15, 2010

who posts emails?

Hey folks! Nice to see you around. And by see, I mean, check out your source in my Google Analytics account.

If you've stumbled upon this page it either means a) you're really advanced and somehow pick up on when I add pages to my site, or b) I coerced you into coming here. If it's b, I'm sorry. I can't help it. I crave attention.

As long as you're here, you might as well read some of the emails I've sent to the Bay Area LDS email list, which is an email list I've been on for the past five years, consisting of several hundred mormon folk in Northern California. You're probably wondering what sort of individual posts emails to a website. Aside from a non-sane one, of course.

There are two reasons. Well, at least two. Maybe five. Possibly seven.

First: I'm proud of my creations. I spent time on these guys. Some of them are works of art, if I say so myself. I'd like them to be remembered with fondness.

Second: I have a very strong opinion on how emails should be composed, and I want to back up my philosophy with examples. If you spend some time to peruse, it should be very apparent, but to summarize briefly: most emails are boring. Boring is boring. Nobody likes boring. You can try and be all businessy and write your emails succinctly with nice long numbered lists, or even write a nice summary paragraph, but guess what? Nobody is going to read it. We don't want to read it. It's boring. Boring. It doesn't matter how organized you manage to scratch out your thoughts, it will not be read, because you are boring everybody. Stop boring everybody.

The only solution is pure, unadulterated strangeness. People read lunacy. They can't get enough of it. I read crazy things all the time. It's addicting. If Dave Barry were writing quarterly reports, you'd bet there'd not be a single overvalued company in the world. Everyone would know exactly what the balance sheet is like, because it would be hilarious.

Okay, that's enough of my off-the-cuff ranting. I'm betting nobody will read this anyways, so the world really hasn't changed.

I hope you like them. If not, I hope you at least try and make your emails/communications less boring. Everyone will appreciate it. If everyone doesn't, at least I will.

Bless you-


1 comment:

  1. I am so happy you are back and your LDS list emails fill my inbox again. Words cannot express the joy I have reading them, so I shant try to explain.